UNITED IN GRIEF Madeleine McCann’s mum lives in hope that ‘tomorrow we will find her’ as she urges others to ‘never give up hope’

McCann's obligatory Christmas 2018 weepie


UNITED IN GRIEF

Madeleine McCann’s mum lives in hope that ‘tomorrow we will find her’ as she urges others to ‘never give up hope’

By Holly Christodoulou and Tracey Kandohla

Kate McCann gave a heartfelt message to other families at a poignant carol service on Monday in London for Missing People

MADELEINE McCann's mum revealed she lives in hope that "tomorrow we will find her" as she told other parents "never give up".

Kate McCann gave the heartfelt message of support to the mum of Bek Stratfield whose son Finn Layland-Stratfield disappeared nearly 18 months ago. (I wonder if Finn Layland-Stratfield is having millions of pounds spent on the search to find him?)

It comes as she prepares for her 12th Christmas without Maddie, who vanished in May 2007 from a holiday apartment in Praia da Luz in Portugal aged three.

Kate met with Bek at a poignant carol service on Monday in London for Missing People where they joined other families and friends of lost loved ones to light candles.

GP Kate, who is an ambassador for the charity, told her: "Just maybe tomorrow will be the day we find something to lead us back to Madeleine and to know what happened.

"It gives us hope. Never give up hope.”

Brave Bek also gave a moving speech during the special service at St Martin-in-the-Fields in Trafalgar Square after Finn from Tintagel, Cornwall, went missing aged 17 in July last year.

She said: "There isn’t one grain of me that will give up hope for Finn and he is in my heart and mind every day.”

Despite a thorough search spanning several countries, there have been no significant clues as to what could have happened to Maddie.

Her parents have been fighting for more funding as they fear the investigation could be shut down in the face of police cuts.

But Kate and husband Gerry were given a boost last month when cops secured £150,000 of extra funding to continue searching for the missing youngster.

The Home Office has provided a further six months worth of funding to Scotland Yard for the investigation, which has already cost £11.6million.

The operation was launched in 2013 after cops in Portugal failed to make any headway in the case.

Maddie was three when she disappeared from a holiday apartment in the Algarve region of Portugal while her parents dined with friends nearby.

She vanished on the evening of May 3 from her bed in a holiday apartment in Rua Dr Agostinho da Silva, Praia da Luz, where she had been sleeping with her brother and sister.

She would have turned 15 on on May 12, 2018.

A number of potential leads have emerged since the little girl vanished, but none amounted to anything and no arrests have ever been made.

In 2010, Maddie’s distraught parents met with then-home secretary Theresa May to talk about the hunt for their daughter.

The following year, Scotland Yard launched its own review, named Operation Grange, into the case at the behest of the future PM.

Monday night's carol service - hosted by charity patron Sir Trevor McDonald - saw the Missing People Choir perform for the congregation.

The finalists of last year’s Britain’s Got Talent sang a highly emotive song ‘I Claudia’ in dedication to chef Claudia Lawrence,  who disappeared aged 35 from York in May 2009.

A Missing People spokesperson told Sun Online: “The event was a huge success, and a chance for people to stand together in solidarity and remember all those missing this Christmas.

"There was a congregation of about 500, more than 100 were people with missing loved ones plus their families, friends, supporters and members of public.”

https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/7957994/madeleine-mccann-mum-hope-find-tomorrow-urges-hope/

And also in the Mirror: https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/madeleine-mccanns-mum-lives-hope-13726119

By Mike Smallcombe 17:58, 20 OCT 2017

Missing Finnian Layland-Stratfield's father says he's accepted that his son is no longer alive

Missing Finn's father says he's accepted that his son is no longer alive and wants to raise awareness of drug abuse among adolescents

The father of a missing 17-year-old boy has broken his silence and revealed that he believed from the beginning that his son took his own life.
Finnian Layland-Stratfield was last seen near Tintagel's youth hostel by a walker on the evening of Saturday, July 8.
The following day at around 5.30pm a rucksack containing some of his personal belongings, including a note, were located on cliffs above Hole Beach in Tintagel.
On the Monday, police issued an appeal for witnesses saying that they were 'extremely concerned' for Finn's welfare.
Nearly four months later, some family, friends and members of the community are still looking for Finn.
But his father, John Layland, says he was told by police last week that proactive searches for Finn have now ceased and that it is his belief that his son took his own life.
Mr Layland also disclosed that a note, written by Finn, was found in the rucksack above the cliffs.
“It’s my opinion, and the police’s opinion, that Finn has taken his own life,” Mr Layland told Cornwall Live.
“The police told me, right from the beginning, that they thought this. However they had to go through the natural process.
“We had a meeting last Saturday (October 14), and we were told by the police that they will keep the case open, because officially he’s still missing. But proactive searches have now ceased.
“Out of respect for others I have waited for this moment before making my statement.
“What I want to emphasise is that I don’t want to upset anyone, I just want to put across the facts, and it’s up to people then to make up their own mind.
“I want to put Finn to rest and make some form of closure."
Mr Layland revealed that Finn left a note above the cliffs, where he believes his son jumped.
“I don’t want to upset too many people,” he said. “But there are people still out there looking for him who don’t know that he left a suicide note at all. So people are going to think that he’s run away.
“We are still searching the beaches, there’s nothing to say people can’t still search the beaches, but we know what for.
“But wild goose chases across the country for a living person are fruitless. And it’s making it more painful for us.”
Mr Layland said: “He was very spiritual and he strongly believed there was something better on the other side.”
Mr Layland and his partner, Jan Brown, also told Cornwall Live what happened on the day Finn was last seen. At the time, Finn was living with his father and Ms Brown in Marshgate, near Boscastle.
“On the Saturday, I dropped him to Tintagel at about 5.30pm,” Ms Brown said. “He told us he was going to see his mate, but no arrangements had actually been made.
“He was seen in a pub in Tintagel, where he had four double rums. He went to the toilet, and all this was caught on CCTV.
“Then he was caught on camera going out of the pub and down Vicarage Hill toward the church. He was seen by a man walking towards the cliffs, at a fair old pace, at about 6.30pm. He seemed OK. Within 15 minutes, his phone went dead.
“The way he cuddled his dad so much when he said goodbye to him, and leaned over in the car and cuddled me goodbye; normally it would be a quick peck on the cheek.
“When you look back on it, it figures completely. It makes so much sense.
"About 15 minutes before his phone went dead he also messaged his best friend saying, 'bye, bro'."
As well as the note, Mr Layland says a lighter and a boot belonging to Finn were also discovered.
“A metre or two below the cliff where they think he jumped they found a lighter, which was confirmed as his, through DNA,” he said.
“They also found a boot at Wanson Mouth, just to the south of Widemouth Bay, on September 22, a day before his 18th birthday. That has been identified as his by family.”
Mr Layland revealed that in the 12-month period before he went missing, his son had self-harmed and struggled with anxiety and addictions to pharmaceutical drugs and alcohol.
“We’ve seen the downward spiral over a period of 12 months. Finn had a mental problem, induced really by the misuse of pharmaceutical drugs. He had a bit of a nature for experimenting, and he liked pushing things to the limit.
“But had I known there were vulnerabilities, I would have done something sooner.
“He lost weight, he couldn’t cope with college and dropped out. He was desperately unhappy. We basically said to him that his mental health and wellbeing was most important, and that we would support him if he wanted to work full-time, with the option of going back to college anytime.
“So he got a full-time job, gardening, but he struggled even then to go to work.
“He didn’t like to live in the box; he could have been real pioneer, he wanted to travel, he had no aspirations to do a 9 to 5 job. He wanted to do volunteer work in Africa. But all of a sudden, all his aspirations went out of the window.
“He spiralled in the last three months of his life. He was a very emotional character, and he really hit rock bottom.
“We felt so helpless at the end. You can’t lock a nearly 18-year-old lad in his bedroom. We wanted to, but you can’t.
“We were screaming at these folk [mental health services]. Conversations with the GP went on right to the end.”
The family was in contact with the mental health services, although Mr Layland says they struggled to access them.
He wishes he had acted sooner, and wants to send a message to other parents who are going through something similar to what Finn's family members did.
“The writing was on the wall and we didn’t act quickly enough,” he said. “It was too little, too late. That’s the sad truth. And I have got to live with myself for the rest of my life.
“I want to get to people’s hearts, so they read this and their children are protected by this. Some good has got to come out of this.
“We need to raise awareness of the symptoms; if parents think that their children are following the same path, they need to seek help earlier than we did. It’s frightening how many youngsters have this same problem.
“If there is any suspicion that their children are using drugs, grab the bull by the horns. Don’t be complacent and think the problem will go away, because it won’t. And don’t just take your child’s word for it; Finn would say he had control of it, but he didn’t.”
Mr Layland described Finn as “the best son I could ever have hoped for”.
He said: “I had a very close relationship with Finn; spiritually, emotionally and physically.
“And he would talk to us about anything. I’m positive if he was going to run away, he would have told me, or he would have contacted me by now. And he wouldn’t have put me through it.
“He was my soul mate, and lovely to be around, although he wasn’t latterly. But, as a son, he was the best I could have wished for. He was gentlemanly, kind, supportive, and very protective over his family. And very popular with his friends and in the community.
“The change was so tragic to see. We knew, but we felt that we didn’t do enough.”
Mr Layland says that the only item that was missing from Finn’s bedroom was a gift he had given to his son to celebrate his beliefs in paganism.
“Finn went with his prized possession, which I had given to him as a spiritual and ceremonial gift to celebrate his beliefs in paganism.
“He took that with him; it’s the only thing that’s gone from his room. To us it’s another thing which proves that he knew where he was going; in his mind he knew exactly what he was doing.
"Finally, I would like to thank the whole of the community for its support at this difficult time. I'm humbled."
In a statement, a spokesman for Devon and Cornwall Police confirmed that the proactive searches for Finn have now ceased.
The spokesman said: “The family is aware that following extensive searches by both the police and members of the public, we have only been able to locate items belonging to Finnian, who himself remains missing; we have no current active leads in this investigation.
“In the case of Finnian, as with all missing people within Devon and Cornwall, they will remain as an active missing person and the investigation will remain open, until a person is either found safe and well or a body is located.
“However, proactive searches have now ceased, but any new information or sightings will of course be investigated.
“Our thoughts are with the family and friends of Finnian during this difficult time.”
If you need confidential support call the Samaritans on 116123 or visit a local Samaritans branch, see www.samaritans.org for details.


https://www.cornwalllive.com/news/cornwall-news/missing-finnian-layland-stratfields-father-660584

Jill Havern wrote:

By Mike Smallcombe 17:58, 20 OCT 2017

Missing Finnian Layland-Stratfield's father says he's accepted that his son is no longer alive

Missing Finn's father says he's accepted that his son is no longer alive and wants to raise awareness of drug abuse among adolescents

The father of a missing 17-year-old boy has broken his silence and revealed that he believed from the beginning that his son took his own life.
Finnian Layland-Stratfield was last seen near Tintagel's youth hostel by a walker on the evening of Saturday, July 8.
The following day at around 5.30pm a rucksack containing some of his personal belongings, including a note, were located on cliffs above Hole Beach in Tintagel.
On the Monday, police issued an appeal for witnesses saying that they were 'extremely concerned' for Finn's welfare.
Nearly four months later, some family, friends and members of the community are still looking for Finn.
But his father, John Layland, says he was told by police last week that proactive searches for Finn have now ceased and that it is his belief that his son took his own life.
Mr Layland also disclosed that a note, written by Finn, was found in the rucksack above the cliffs.
“It’s my opinion, and the police’s opinion, that Finn has taken his own life,” Mr Layland told Cornwall Live.
“The police told me, right from the beginning, that they thought this. However they had to go through the natural process.
“We had a meeting last Saturday (October 14), and we were told by the police that they will keep the case open, because officially he’s still missing. But proactive searches have now ceased.
“Out of respect for others I have waited for this moment before making my statement.
“What I want to emphasise is that I don’t want to upset anyone, I just want to put across the facts, and it’s up to people then to make up their own mind.
“I want to put Finn to rest and make some form of closure."
Mr Layland revealed that Finn left a note above the cliffs, where he believes his son jumped.
“I don’t want to upset too many people,” he said. “But there are people still out there looking for him who don’t know that he left a suicide note at all. So people are going to think that he’s run away.
“We are still searching the beaches, there’s nothing to say people can’t still search the beaches, but we know what for.
“But wild goose chases across the country for a living person are fruitless. And it’s making it more painful for us.”
Mr Layland said: “He was very spiritual and he strongly believed there was something better on the other side.”
Mr Layland and his partner, Jan Brown, also told Cornwall Live what happened on the day Finn was last seen. At the time, Finn was living with his father and Ms Brown in Marshgate, near Boscastle.
“On the Saturday, I dropped him to Tintagel at about 5.30pm,” Ms Brown said. “He told us he was going to see his mate, but no arrangements had actually been made.
“He was seen in a pub in Tintagel, where he had four double rums. He went to the toilet, and all this was caught on CCTV.
“Then he was caught on camera going out of the pub and down Vicarage Hill toward the church. He was seen by a man walking towards the cliffs, at a fair old pace, at about 6.30pm. He seemed OK. Within 15 minutes, his phone went dead.
“The way he cuddled his dad so much when he said goodbye to him, and leaned over in the car and cuddled me goodbye; normally it would be a quick peck on the cheek.
“When you look back on it, it figures completely. It makes so much sense.
"About 15 minutes before his phone went dead he also messaged his best friend saying, 'bye, bro'."
As well as the note, Mr Layland says a lighter and a boot belonging to Finn were also discovered.
“A metre or two below the cliff where they think he jumped they found a lighter, which was confirmed as his, through DNA,” he said.
“They also found a boot at Wanson Mouth, just to the south of Widemouth Bay, on September 22, a day before his 18th birthday. That has been identified as his by family.”
Mr Layland revealed that in the 12-month period before he went missing, his son had self-harmed and struggled with anxiety and addictions to pharmaceutical drugs and alcohol.
“We’ve seen the downward spiral over a period of 12 months. Finn had a mental problem, induced really by the misuse of pharmaceutical drugs. He had a bit of a nature for experimenting, and he liked pushing things to the limit.
“But had I known there were vulnerabilities, I would have done something sooner.
“He lost weight, he couldn’t cope with college and dropped out. He was desperately unhappy. We basically said to him that his mental health and wellbeing was most important, and that we would support him if he wanted to work full-time, with the option of going back to college anytime.
“So he got a full-time job, gardening, but he struggled even then to go to work.
“He didn’t like to live in the box; he could have been real pioneer, he wanted to travel, he had no aspirations to do a 9 to 5 job. He wanted to do volunteer work in Africa. But all of a sudden, all his aspirations went out of the window.
“He spiralled in the last three months of his life. He was a very emotional character, and he really hit rock bottom.
“We felt so helpless at the end. You can’t lock a nearly 18-year-old lad in his bedroom. We wanted to, but you can’t.
“We were screaming at these folk [mental health services]. Conversations with the GP went on right to the end.”
The family was in contact with the mental health services, although Mr Layland says they struggled to access them.
He wishes he had acted sooner, and wants to send a message to other parents who are going through something similar to what Finn's family members did.
“The writing was on the wall and we didn’t act quickly enough,” he said. “It was too little, too late. That’s the sad truth. And I have got to live with myself for the rest of my life.
“I want to get to people’s hearts, so they read this and their children are protected by this. Some good has got to come out of this.
“We need to raise awareness of the symptoms; if parents think that their children are following the same path, they need to seek help earlier than we did. It’s frightening how many youngsters have this same problem.
“If there is any suspicion that their children are using drugs, grab the bull by the horns. Don’t be complacent and think the problem will go away, because it won’t. And don’t just take your child’s word for it; Finn would say he had control of it, but he didn’t.”
Mr Layland described Finn as “the best son I could ever have hoped for”.
He said: “I had a very close relationship with Finn; spiritually, emotionally and physically.
“And he would talk to us about anything. I’m positive if he was going to run away, he would have told me, or he would have contacted me by now. And he wouldn’t have put me through it.
“He was my soul mate, and lovely to be around, although he wasn’t latterly. But, as a son, he was the best I could have wished for. He was gentlemanly, kind, supportive, and very protective over his family. And very popular with his friends and in the community.
“The change was so tragic to see. We knew, but we felt that we didn’t do enough.”
Mr Layland says that the only item that was missing from Finn’s bedroom was a gift he had given to his son to celebrate his beliefs in paganism.
“Finn went with his prized possession, which I had given to him as a spiritual and ceremonial gift to celebrate his beliefs in paganism.
“He took that with him; it’s the only thing that’s gone from his room. To us it’s another thing which proves that he knew where he was going; in his mind he knew exactly what he was doing.
"Finally, I would like to thank the whole of the community for its support at this difficult time. I'm humbled."
In a statement, a spokesman for Devon and Cornwall Police confirmed that the proactive searches for Finn have now ceased.
The spokesman said: “The family is aware that following extensive searches by both the police and members of the public, we have only been able to locate items belonging to Finnian, who himself remains missing; we have no current active leads in this investigation.
“In the case of Finnian, as with all missing people within Devon and Cornwall, they will remain as an active missing person and the investigation will remain open, until a person is either found safe and well or a body is located.
“However, proactive searches have now ceased, but any new information or sightings will of course be investigated.
“Our thoughts are with the family and friends of Finnian during this difficult time.”
If you need confidential support call the Samaritans on 116123 or visit a local Samaritans branch, see www.samaritans.org for details.


https://www.cornwalllive.com/news/cornwall-news/missing-finnian-layland-stratfields-father-660584

...such a sad story Jill.  I hate "Society", but love community.  We seem so ill equipped to reach people, in particular young men?  when they most need help.  If you can speak to anyone today, do it.  It could be just a few word of comfort that they need, no matter how insignificant it may seem to you.  "I'm fine" is for me anyway usually, a mask for how awful I'm feeling.  So please, if you get a chance speak to anyone you can today.