Help Us Find the Abductors Of Kate McCann’s Conscience

by kinell 24.10.13 10:13

Help Us Find the Abductors Of Kate McCann’s Conscience

tmunce / 6 hours ago http://crimebodge.com/help-us-find-the-abductors-of-kate-mccanns-conscience/

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6 years ago in the Algarve, this woman lost her conscience…

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…It was taken from her during the night while she was sat eating Tapas with her husband and posh friends.
It was a mistake that cost her the luxury of mediocrity, and plunged her into a hellish nightmare of celebrity.
A mistake we could all have made…
…Leaving the room of a foreign hotel with our precious belongings: Keys, wallet and passport. But forgetting the children under 5 we’d stashed beneath the blankets.

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Have you seen Kate McCann and her husband Gerry’s conscience?

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It is distinguishable notably by it’s absence. And a photoshopped teardrop beneath Kate McCann’s eye when she’s doing interviews for colour supplements.
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Although no firm evidence has emerged that the McCann’s blame themselves, we cannot give up hope that one day they will admit they were negligent. Until then the search must go on. Particularly in places where a celebrity hand wants shaking or a messianic photograph of Kate staring wistfully off into the distance clutching a teddy bear wants taking.

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Can You Help Us?

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It doesn’t matter who you are. All that matters is that you have no sense of proportion and side with popular consensus regardless of it’s hypocrisy or morality.
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Every little bit helps!

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Perhaps you could cut out a picture of Kate McCann and place it in your window or onto the front page of every major newspaper in the UK. Or maybe just ask for an audience with his holiness the pope.
It doesn’t matter how small your effort. Even just handing out awards to Gerry for his contribution to Children’s Welfare. As Harold Shipman once furthered the cause for ‘Help the Aged’.

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A small contribution would also be welcome.

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Just a pang of guilt or a nub of sympathy would help prevent the McCanns from having to blame themselves for something that was entirely their fault.
Already hundreds of journalists, commentators, celebrities, ministers and publicity seeking whores have donated a mountain of pity. And child protection services and the police have done their bit by looking the other way.
But your money won’t just help the McCanns. There are thousands of shit parents in the UK who put themselves before their children. Help them feel better by reminding them that they aren’t the only ones who have put their children at risk. Other people – who should also know better – have done it too!

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RESPONSIBILITY FOR OUR ACTIONS CAN HAPPEN AT ANY TIME.

DON’T LET IT HAPPEN TO YOU!

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Please accept my contribution of _____________ for pretending that the McCanns are anything other than bad parents.
Yes, I am a menopausal woman that gets off on the warm glow of public sympathy.
I accept that thousands of children go missing every year but these parents are special because they are posh.
If I cannot extend my sympathies to somebody who clearly has little of their own, I shall invade internet forums such as ‘MumsNet’ screaming abuse at anyone who dares criticize the McCann’s for getting away with the sort of thing a working class mother would have been crucified for.

Please note, we are especially interested in donations from Portuguese Police, who let’s face it, if it wasn’t for them the McCanns would have had to look themselves in the mirror a long time ago.[/font][/color]

by Cerinthe 24.10.13 11:56

Too funny

by Guest 24.10.13 12:03

Love it! I think there's more chance of nailing down the Egg Man (before he was eliminated or egg-sterminated) than there is of finding the conscience of any of Team McCann.

by ultimaThule 24.10.13 13:25

Very clever and devastatingly accurate, apart from there being no mention of KM being born 'almost perfect' except for a conscience and her 'almost perfect' pyschopathic spouse's defect being a complete absence of human emotion.