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Mother BANNED from having babies after she abandons her four children in hotel room

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Mother BANNED from having babies after she abandons her four children in hotel room

Post by PeterMac on 30.12.12 22:07

Mother BANNED from having babies after she abandons her four children in hotel room to go out partying
Kimberly Lightsey, 30, forced to comply after being put on probation for 13 years by a Florida judge

The court heard how Lightsey had left her children, aged from one to 11 years old, alone in a hotel room in Winter Haven, Florida.
Another guest at the hotel tipped off police after hearing crying coming from the bedroom and an overturned stroller in a hallway.
Lightsey was arrested when she returned to the hotel room. All of her children were taken into care before being placed with relatives.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2254924/Mother-Florida-abandoned-children-hotel-room-banned-having-babies.html

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Re: Mother BANNED from having babies after she abandons her four children in hotel room

Post by Observer on 30.12.12 22:23

@PeterMac wrote:Mother BANNED from having babies after she abandons her four children in hotel room to go out partying
Kimberly Lightsey, 30, forced to comply after being put on probation for 13 years by a Florida judge

The court heard how Lightsey had left her children, aged from one to 11 years old, alone in a hotel room in Winter Haven, Florida.
Another guest at the hotel tipped off police after hearing crying coming from the bedroom and an overturned stroller in a hallway.
Lightsey was arrested when she returned to the hotel room. All of her children were taken into care before being placed with relatives.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2254924/Mother-Florida-abandoned-children-hotel-room-banned-having-babies.html
At least there was an eleven year old there, who would most probably have known what to do should an emergency occur. Disgusting parenting none the less.

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Re: Mother BANNED from having babies after she abandons her four children in hotel room

Post by Guest on 31.12.12 9:11

We don't know though if the eldest child was the one with epilepsy and cerebral palsy.
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Re: Mother BANNED from having babies after she abandons her four children in hotel room

Post by aquila on 31.12.12 9:38

Has anyone ever thought that should this mother become pregnant again there will be a human rights lawyer chomping at the bit?

I find I'm against this ruling. The mother committed offences which were punishable with a custodial sentence. In my opinion it is not for a judge to legislate especially in a person's right to have children. I've shocked myself with my opinion, I'm generally not so liberal in thought especially when it comes to daft women who have no sense of responsibility for their children.
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I wish I had not read this.

Post by Guest on 31.12.12 10:09

I wish I had not read this. I thought I steered clear of the last cliff this year.
Not so.
This is exacly what it's all about. Now we are talking core business.
I am dead against the ruling, have to be out of dear necessity.
We'll end up in Hitler territory!

I dont want any government nor its judges to have any say about that!




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Re: Mother BANNED from having babies after she abandons her four children in hotel room

Post by PeterMac on 31.12.12 10:40

@aquila wrote:Has anyone ever thought that should this mother become pregnant again there will be a human rights lawyer chomping at the bit?
. . . In my opinion it is not for a judge to legislate especially in a person's right to have children. . .
But will there be a Human Rights lawyer speaking for the children ? I thought not !
We always focus on the "Right" of a mother to have a child.

When a child is conceived, or born, it surely acquires certain "rights" which for its parents become the corresponding 'duties and responsibilities'.
1 The right to be fed adequately
2 The right to be housed adequately
3 The right to be clothed adequately and appropriately
4 The right to have its health needs adequately addressed
5 The right to be educated to a standard appropriate to its intelligence

If the putative parents are not able to secure each of these, they should think extremely carefully about who is going to provide those essentials.

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Re: Mother BANNED from having babies after she abandons her four children in hotel room

Post by aquila on 31.12.12 11:21

@PeterMac wrote:
@aquila wrote:Has anyone ever thought that should this mother become pregnant again there will be a human rights lawyer chomping at the bit?
. . . In my opinion it is not for a judge to legislate especially in a person's right to have children. . .
But will there be a Human Rights lawyer speaking for the children ? I thought not !
We always focus on the "Right" of a mother to have a child.

When a child is conceived, or born, it surely acquires certain "rights" which for its parents become the corresponding 'duties and responsibilities'.
1 The right to be fed adequately
2 The right to be housed adequately
3 The right to be clothed adequately and appropriately
4 The right to have its health needs adequately addressed
5 The right to be educated to a standard appropriate to its intelligence

If the putative parents are not able to secure each of these, they should think extremely carefully about who is going to provide those essentials.

I agree with most of what you say PeterMac, however there is no legislation to deal with this and it is up to legislators to come up with satisfactory solutions to protect children and support the financial security of a nation. If a judge can bypass law and impose this arrangement on a person (I'm not standing up for the daft mother) then what next? What if the judge gets it wrong in a case and a mother is innocent? What if there is an idea to deplete the population of crime-ridden areas by doing deals with women who agree to not have children in return for non-custodial sentences? I think that is a very dangerous and possibly sinister road. It could and no doubt would lead to all sorts of social cleansing.
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Re: Mother BANNED from having babies after she abandons her four children in hotel room

Post by littlepixie on 31.12.12 20:05

My opinion won't be popular but I am all for contraceptive implants being used on certain individuals. They are ALREADY used here when a young girl has a baby under age. The implant is inserted soon after the birth and lasts 3 years.
I have seen what happens to the children of mothers who have no natural affection for them and refuse to take responsbility for them. They are left to live feral lives scratching round for food. Left to provide meals of crisps and biscuits for their younger siblings when they are only babies themselves. They are often taken advantage of and abused by other adults and older children as they have no-one there to protect them.

I know of one boy who really WAS a full-time parent to his brothers at 6 years of age!
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Re: Mother BANNED from having babies after she abandons her four children in hotel room

Post by Nina on 31.12.12 20:25

@littlepixie wrote:My opinion won't be popular but I am all for contraceptive implants being used on certain individuals. They are ALREADY used here when a young girl has a baby under age. The implant is inserted soon after the birth and lasts 3 years.
I have seen what happens to the children of mothers who have no natural affection for them and refuse to take responsbility for them. They are left to live feral lives scratching round for food. Left to provide meals of crisps and biscuits for their younger siblings when they are only babies themselves. They are often taken advantage of and abused by other adults and older children as they have no-one there to protect them.

I know of one boy who really WAS a full-time parent to his brothers at 6 years of age!

In an ideal world we shouldn't tell people when they can and can't have children, but this isn't an ideal world and do mothers such as the one on this thread actually want children, or, do they want the man, the sex, maybe if they are very lucky some affection as well?
I agree with implants but only if the woman has agreed to it being inserted and she has the right to have it removed if she truly wants a child. It certainly stops the forgotten pill or the cannot be arsed after sex pill, or the burst condom being the reason a child is conceived.
I too may be unpopular for this belief, but I too have seen neglected children.

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Re: Mother BANNED from having babies after she abandons her four children in hotel room

Post by Guest on 31.12.12 20:30

Nina, I am too in a "twix" regarding this subject. I am against "government" whichever they may be, to interfere with our personal lives and the way we [want to] live it. But then, again, I am absolutely, totally, against children being born in an environment where they are not loved, cherished, taken care of, neglected ... as they never had a choice and have to live [if they don't die] with the consequences, whereas the "adults" did have one: a choice ...
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Re: Mother BANNED from having babies after she abandons her four children in hotel room

Post by littlepixie on 31.12.12 20:40

The 6 year old parents mother had another baby thinking everyone had forgotten. It was taken at birth. She had already ruined enough childrens lives.
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Re: Mother BANNED from having babies after she abandons her four children in hotel room

Post by Tony Bennett on 31.12.12 20:48

@aquila wrote:Has anyone ever thought that should this mother become pregnant again there will be a human rights lawyer chomping at the bit?

I find I'm against this ruling. The mother committed offences which were punishable with a custodial sentence. In my opinion it is not for a judge to legislate especially in a person's right to have children. I've shocked myself with my opinion, I'm generally not so liberal in thought especially when it comes to daft women who have no sense of responsibility for their children.
In a roundabout way, aquila, we already have such a system here, only we do it differently.

I've worked in Social Services, overall, for 7 years, during which time I came across numerous instances where an expected baby would be taken away from the mother at birth.

This was invariably, as per PeterMac, in cases where the mother had proved incapable of bringing up children and there was a serious risk that the new-born baby would fail to thrive, or be ill-treated.

The procedure was that the local maternity unit/midwifery services would be put on notice that Social Services intended to take Mrs X's child into care at birth. Then, the moment the child was in labour, Social Services would be contacted and would get an Emergency Protection Order from a magistrate. The new baby would be removed from the mother's care within hours, and placed usually with foster parents experienced in dealing with new-born babies; some of them had looked after dozens of such babies. They would then mostly be put up for adoption.

Some mothers who had experienced the removal of their child on one occasion would get pregnant again and then lose the next child. Sometimes this happened 3 or 4 timers. It was often (though not always) distressing for the mother.

I would have to say that although some cases were more borderline than others, in most cases the mother concerned was either unable or unwilling to care properly for a growing child, and the children thus adopted will mostly have had a better life as a result.

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Re: Mother BANNED from having babies after she abandons her four children in hotel room

Post by littlepixie on 31.12.12 21:05

I have seen the other side where babies are taken at birth and placed in foster care and the Judge allows the mother daily contact with the baby with the view to it going back IF the mother can prove her parenting skills. This is usually an hour a day supervised contact. The baby is taken by a sessional worker from the foster carers and to a contact centre.

I've heard that some mothers really try and turn up every day and nurse their babies. Others place the baby on the floor in a child carry seat and spend the whole hour texting their friends on their phone ignoring the child. The latter are quite happy to only have to put up with the child for an hour a day as they then have the rest of the day to do as they please.

There is a change in the air and the automatic daily contact regime the Court recommended for new-borns is being seriously looked at as it is now felt that the contact is NOT there for the mothers benefit but for the benefit of the child only.

If it is proved that the child is not benefitting from the contact it is to be stopped.
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Re: Mother BANNED from having babies after she abandons her four children in hotel room

Post by PeterMac on 31.12.12 23:31

Downton Abbey (UK) Quotes
Season 3 / Episode 8: - Series 3, Episode 8

Dowager Countess of Grantham: One forgets about parenthood. The on-and-on-ness of it.
Isobel Crawley: Were you a very involved mother with Robert and Rosamund?
Dowager Countess of Grantham: Does it surprise you?
Isobel Crawley: A bit. I'd imagined them surrounded by nannies and governesses, being starched and ironed to spend an hour with you after tea.
Dowager Countess of Grantham: Yes, , , , but it was an hour *every day*.
Isobel Crawley: [momentarily lost for words] I see, yes. How tiring!

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Re: Mother BANNED from having babies after she abandons her four children in hotel room

Post by PeterMac on 01.01.13 8:35

@Tony Bennett wrote:
I've worked in Social Services, overall, for 7 years, during which time I came across numerous instances where an expected baby would be taken away from the mother at birth.
This was invariably, as per PeterMac, in cases where the mother had proved incapable of bringing up children and there was a serious risk that the new-born baby would fail to thrive, or be ill-treated.
The procedure was that the local maternity unit/midwifery services would be put on notice that Social Services intended to take Mrs X's child into care at birth. Then, the moment the child was in labour, Social Services would be contacted and would get an Emergency Protection Order from a magistrate. The new baby would be removed from the mother's care within hours, and placed usually with foster parents experienced in dealing with new-born babies; some of them had looked after dozens of such babies. They would then mostly be put up for adoption.
Some mothers who had experienced the removal of their child on one occasion would get pregnant again and then lose the next child. Sometimes this happened 3 or 4 timers. It was often (though not always) distressing for the mother.
Not uncommon at all in the areas I worked during my early service.
One of the interesting issues was how the girls referred to the child. It was never referred to by its given name, or in the possessive, it was always just 'baby'.
Or "bay bay" in the slack jawed intonation so favoured by people in that level of society.


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Re: Mother BANNED from having babies after she abandons her four children in hotel room

Post by aiyoyo on 01.01.13 9:31

Hi All,
HAPPY 2013!
May the New Year Brings You the Best Ever, and May All Your Wishes Become Realities!

What a unpleasant subject to discuss on New Year's day.
Anyhow, I am all for the State banning her from having more children. She has FOUR already, and didn't care about their human rights so why should she deserve her human rights to be an automatic given over and above the rights of other little human beings who are vulnerable, helpless, and defenseless at that tender age? Why should she has the right to produce and subject more to misery when she's mentally incapable or not willing to be responsible for their welfare and safety. When she left those children alone in the hotel room she was endangering them to risk of abduction (yes, we know all about that risk from that biggest infamous case drummed into us by the Mcspinners). More importantly, she's putting them at risk of all sorts of dangers..
For examples:
Should one of the young ones choke on vomit how is an 11-year old going to know what to do or cope with it?
Should she encounter a fatal accident while being away from her children who's to know those children are left unattended and unsupervised alone in a room?
How long must she be gone and failed to return before the oldest child is allowed to alert anyone? I should hardly think someone as selfish and irresponsible as her would teach the 11 year old to reach out for help.

When irresponsible individual like her violate the rights of her children effectively she's setting a detrimental trend for her children. Behavior breeds behavior, hence dysfunctional family breeds dysfunctional family generations down the line, resulting in a certain segment of society always remaining dysfunctional. The State must step in to help these vulnerable children to help them break away from the trend of dysfunctional parent/s, dysfunctional life and environment if there's to be hope of a normal life for the development and future of those poor children.

Generally people (including myself) are not for State intrusion into personal life but in this instance I feel it is a right decision.
Else imagine what life is going to be like for her existing children and future children and the burden she places on a Society having to wipe her bottom all the time.

If people think State's intervention on her right to reproduce is wrong, what about China's one-child policy regardless - no matter whether you be the richest and most powerful ,or just a peasant, and your potential parenting skills not factored in.

Now would that be considered State's violation of the women's human rights in China? China's populous situation is not just a domestic one but an international one, but do people see anyone in the world protesting against this State intrusion into personal life by the most populous Nation in the World? NO? If it is not wrong for China to impose that on its women population by decree why should it be wrong for other States to impose it on an irresponsible woman who neglects and puts her children at risk of all sorts.

That poor 11-year old left to babysit her siblings while confined in a strange room deserves not to have more new siblings sprung or imposed on her/him.

Of course no one is for State intrusion into personal lives but when you have individual who risked children's human rights even harming their human rights then measures must be imposed on the offender to correct that, even if it means banning her from reproducing further. We are not talking about a general policy here, but in context of this particular case. I think it is a right decision in order to prevent further damage to her children.



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